26 April 2013

But I don't have peace of mind. And if you don't have that, you have nothing

Last night I watched Alfie. It's a movie about a British player in America.  The main reason he's a player is becasue he struggles to commit to one girl and I also think that he's looking for more in life, but we never find out what that reallyis. 

 I had nothing else to do and I saw the movie on the shelf, so I thought "Why not" and put it on as snuggled under the duvet to watch the movie.



The most profound line in the movie is right at the end when Alfie says, "What have I got… really… some money in my pocket, some nice threads, a fancy car at my disposal, and I am single… unattached, free as a bird. I don’t depend on nobody. Nobody depends on me. My life’s my own. But I don’t have peace of mind. And if you don’t have that, you have nothing"

The last bit... "But I don't have peace of mind. And if you don't have that, you have nothing" really stayed with me.  I was like, that is so true.  We can have everything, yet be as restless as ever. We could be living the busiest, craziest lives and be surrounded by awesome people and adventures all the time but without peace you'll still be restless looking for something more... more exciting, more adventurous, more daring etc.

A while ago I never had this peace of mind, I was always restless and always looking for the next adventure. I always needed to have a plan, something to do or somewhere to go to fill that restlessness. I've discovered that the only thing that can remove the restlessness and fill that void I like to fill is Jesus.  He can give you peace of mind. Matthew 11;28 says: "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest for your soul" This is so true. 

Once I had gone to Jesus ans asked him to give me peace, did I experience real peace.  I wasn't seeking the next crazy adventure anymore and I was more than happy to just spend time alone. I am now able to spend time with my thoughts and just be. I no longer have the desire to find something to do, just to have something to do.  It's one of the greatest feelings ever. 

I still have moments when I loose focus and dash off, but then I remember that the only one that can fill me and stop the "rush" is Jesus. When I remember this and do it,  I once again have peace of mind. 

xKx






24 April 2013

I LOVE MY KIDS

I lead youth on Wednesday nigh at church. I lead Gap, which is made up of the grade 6's to 7's, basically 12 – 14 year olds. I absolutely love my kids, there's a bout 10 of them who come regularly and they drive me batty some nights or leave me laughing hysterically other nights.

Tonight was one of the nights where I laughed like a loon most of the time.

Things Kids Say

I arrived at 6:35pm and handed my laptop to Huggi, (he leads with me), so that he could set up worship. A few of the kids gathered around him as he chose the songs. I walked past to go and fetch something as Arthur asked if Huggi would play “God is disabled” We looked at each other and I quickly ran out of the room laughing as Huggi said, “no we can't play that but we can play God is able, which is what the song is called”

Excitement Over A Game

I then went to fetch hula hoops for the game we were going to play later. Arthur then asks me if we are going to play a game. I said yes, the hula hoop one. He got so excited about it and then ran off. 10 minutes later he asked me again and when I said yes he got sooooo excited again. He asked me about 4 times if we were playing a game and go super excited all four times.

The Race

Emilie came to Huggi and told him that he could run faster than him. Huggi was like no after about 5 minutes if this Oscar joined in and they planned a race. Somehow I ended up involved and the next thing I knew I was standing on the balcony at church getting ready to race two boys. I lost by a long shot, I was half way when they were finished. They then raced Huggi and he won, much to our surprise.

Tonight was a random night of fun at Gap, which made me appreciate these kids so much more and love them even more.

xKx


20 April 2013

mmmm......

Last week Saturday my car kind of exploded.  It over heated in town and there was steam and water everywhere. Chip, my car was rushed off to the mechanic and R3700 later he had a skimmed cylinder head, new welsh plugs, new gaskets, new welsh plugs and a new water pipe.  The mechanical work doesn't stop there.  My mechanic advised me to sell chip because I'm about to spend A LOT more money on him soon.  The gears are going to go soonish and the engine is smoking a bit. He's an old car and I think... the time to sell is looming.  I just need to do a lot of praying about it and see where God is leading with this.

The bleakest thing about having my car explode last Saturday was that on Tuesday, Bubs has an operation and I couldn't go and visit him because I was carless.  This week I also missed him the most since we got back together. (The story of Bubs (Dave) and I is a whole new post for another day)  I can't explain why or what made me miss him so much, but I did.  I felt kind of silly for missing him soooooooo much.

Yesterday I finally got to see him and it was the best time EVER!  After I got Chip back raced through to Hout bay to make it in time to go and see Daves band play at Battle of the bands. I never made it in time, :-( but we ended up having a super chilled evening talking. We played chess, until I got over it. My attention span is limited when it comes to chess.  I also don't play with much of a strategy, which is why I always loose. :-)   After the game we snuggled on the couch and just spoke some more, about random things like our stomaches talking to each other and then about deeper things.  It was totally epic spennding the evening with Bubs, talking.

Last night really was one of the best nights EVER!

xKx

18 April 2013

BEST Red Velvet Cupcake EVER

Yesterday when Mel fetched me, we went past Charly's Bakery to show Melissa it.  Charlies Bakery is one of the best cake shops in Cape Town. 

While we were there, Mel told me about their red velvet cupcakes and cakes.  She was telling me how they are the best in Cape Town and that they use real beetroot to get the red colour. Most bakery's seem to end up with a browny red colour becasue they use red food colouring.  
 
Today, Basil from the office down the corridor waltzed into our office with cake from Charly's bakery.  He often brings the girls in our office cake.  In his selection of cakes was a red velvet cupcake.  I was like YES PLEASE!
 

I must say it was the BEST red velvet cupcake that I have EVER eaten.  It took the cake from my favourite cupcake shop, Lady Cupcake and won hands down. 
 
xKx
 
 

12 April 2013

Sick in bed

Last week Sunday afternoon I started to get a sore throat. It felt like there were a hundred knives sticking into my throat.  When I woke up on Monday my throat felt like it was on FIRE.  Every time I swallowed it hurt like crazy, by Wednesday I had no more energy and felt positively ill.  I was grumpy, my head hurt, my ears hurt and were super sensitive to sound and my body hurt.  That was when I decided that I need to go to the doctor on Thursday.

On Thursday I called in sick and went to visit Dr Rinky.  She is one of the BEST doctors in the world.  After she took my tempreture, looked down my thoat, listened to my heart, took my blood pressure and looked in my ears she told me that I had a sinus infection.  She prescribed some antibiotics, nose spray and bed rest for a few days.

I went home and jumped into bed and I have kind of stayed there for most of the past two days.  Yesterday was ok and most of today was ok, but now at 4pm on day two of staying in bed and resting... I've started to get restless and I want to go and do something.  My ADD has kicked in and I can no longer stay still. I know that I need to FORCE myself to stay in bed and not go out, because I don't want to get worse or not get better.  The will to get better quickly ranks higher than going out and doing something, but I need to find something to entertian myself for a little bit longer before I can go out and conquer the world.

I think I'll go and find a movie to watch to waste a few more hours until supper time and then I can sleep until Saturday when I should be MUCH better and able to conquer the wrld again.

                                                                                                           xKx


9 April 2013

Strong and Courageous

Last week I read Deuteronomy 31:1 - 8. It's just before the Israelites enter the promised land and Moses tells the people that he won't be going with them.  He tells them to be strong and courageous. He also tells them that Joshua will go ahead of them when they cross the river.  Moses then speaks to Joshua and tells him that he needs to be stong and courageous as well.

After I had read this I started to think about what these section of the bible meant and this is what I came up with.

Being strong doesn't only refer to being physically strong, maybe it's a metaphor for being spiritually strong?? The way that we are spiritually strong is by growing our faith in God and trusting him more. We need to be exercising our faith - that way it gets stronger, kind of like a muscle. 

Being strong and courageous goes hand in hand. You need to be strong to be courageous.  If you have faith and trust God it's a lot easier to be courageous and go out on a limb for him. To take that jump and do what he wants because we'll know that with him we can do it.  

I think this is why Moses tells the people to be strong and courageous, because they need to be both.  He also says that God goes before them, this helps to build them up and strengthen them, thus helping them to be courageous.  

The part where Moses tells the people that he's not going to cross the Jordan river with them and then goes and tells Joshua that he will go. I read it as Moses way of telling him that he's passed the baton onto him and now Joshua will take" his place to lead the people in to the promised land.  I then though about how this applies in our lives and thought about how leaders eventually have to move on so that new people can move into leadership, kind of like presidents and other people in leadership. 
 
A New Thought After Talking With My Bestie
 
After discussing these thoughts were Terri, she pointed out that for their to be new leader, Moses chose Joshua but alos Joshua hung around Moses and showed him that he had leadership potential.  From this thought we got the idea that for a new leader to rise up, someone needs to show leadership poetential and someone needs to see this and start mentoring them and growing them to take over from them. This is what Mel, my mentor, friend and pastor at church as done with a few of the young adults who are now in leadership.  Without this, there won't be new leaders, like with the Isrealites.  After Joshua died no one took over from him and things got a bit messy.  
 
xKx



 

3 April 2013

Homeless people and the stories they tell

Yesterday while I was walking back to work, a guy in a hoodie and jeans stopped and asked me for money.  He told me that he had been running around trying to get R120 together to stay in a backpackers.  If I had time and wasn't running late to get back from lunch, I would have asked him why he needed R120 for the backpackers and where all of his stuff was.  I wanted to know his story.

As I walked down the road I remembered that he was the same guy who has asked me for money a couple of weeks ago outside my office with the same story.  This got me to thinking.. I think he was homeless and this was a story that he was telling everyone.

This thought lead me to the stories that homeless people tell.  I encounter A LOT of homeless people walking from the station to work every day.  Usually they just ask form money, but then there are some who have given me a long story of how they need money for a taxi to an interview. Then there's the story of having a kid and they need money to staty some where.  There's also the people who show the haven night sheler card and ask for money for that. Every single time a homeless person tells me their story, I want to help them... but I know I can't. I don't have the resources or the money to find them jobs, provide places for them to stay or save them. It's the whole star fish story, BUT that's a whole seperate post.

I often wonder how a homeless person became a homeless person. Where they born into it? Did they do something and their family had enough and cast them out?  Have they spent MONTHS looking for a job and this is the last resort... and then the horrible thought of do they get more money begging?

One day, when I have a storng heart, I want to stop and talk to a few homeless people and hear their story as to why they are homeless and begging.  I hope that they are honest when I do stop and chat and that they don't tell me another sob story. 

I guess I should pray for God to provide a way for me to do this and that he guides the process and opens the doors for honest communication... And then when I meet the next homeless person asking me for money... ask them to tel me their story and how they got there.

xKx